Hey Jude, You'll do

Dear You,

You're being a whore, and you know it. You stole my phone. Harmless, I thought. You're not mean enough to do anything about it. But no. I can't want anything without you being a little child and wanting it to.
I love Sam. I'll say it: I love him. So thanks for helping him talk to me again on the 5th, but seriously, what the fuck. Shut up and quit talking to him. Stop pretending you are not interested, because you are. Stop bad mouthing my other friends to him. Look, they are less fucking retarded than you. At least Carlie admits, yes, he's hot, but I she knows I staked my claim. You mocked me for so long about him I'm seriously going to kick the shit out of you if you don't stop soon.
He's my dream guy. Get your own fucking dream, and don't drink. You're too young and already too stupid for that shit.

No love,
Me.

PS: I'd call you out in person, but you have my sunglasses still, you bitch. As soon as I get them back, I'm calling you out. I like my sunglasses more than you.



Dear You Too,

Sweet merciful heavens. When I rant to you, it's because I'm mad. Don't try to be mediator and fix ours problems; shut the fuck up and listen. I can handle this, but really, don't help. You are making it worse so that she can only bitch to me more.
You're not good at this, so I'm not telling you anything any more. Don't pass that shit on. Rants are for LISTENING. You should know me well enough that if I wanted to say anything, I would. I wouldn't tell you, especially not to tell her. Don't be a snitch. There's a reason in mob movies Frankie the Rat doesn't last long; no one likes a squealer, no matter their intent.

No Love,
Me.



Dear Dad,

Chill. It will all be okay. Just don't vent only on me when my brother goes to college. My nerves are running far too thin for my age already.

Love,
Me.

PS: Work out more. Eat less. Trust me.


Hey you with the hat,

No, I don't want to go out with you. I know who you are. I know you tried to dance with me at the mixer, and yes, it was like you were attempting to hump me. So no thanks. My eyes are set somewhere else, anyway.

Me


Dear Chelsie,

I missed you. I want to hang again soon. <3 Me