Please Forgive Me

Maybe one day I'll tell you how I feel and I'll be lying.

Maybe one day you'll tell me you've changed your heart, and I just won't care anymore.

Maybe one day I'll get what I need.

The only reason I'm still holding on to you is because the "someone better" who is waiting for me either got lost or just is a bit late in coming. Either way, until I find someone better, you're the best shot I have.

You're pretty. Talented. Witty. A dash nerdy.

I was able to let the other guy down with the old "I can't date yet" excuse, which is a partial truth, but when will I stop because I actually found a reason to date?

I'm so self-destructive.

But I can't tell Sam again. He's heard it once, and heard me try to explain that I ONLY want to be his friend, if he'd let me and if we could get rid of the awkwardness between us.

I only want to be his friend.

I only want to be his friend.

I only want to be his friend.

I only want to be his everything.

And I shouldn't. Everyone wants me to get over him, to heal, to find closure and move on.

The closure is not coming, we've gone too far.

So I made you laugh today. I want to see it.

School dance is Friday. I guess you won't be there now, but I wish you would be, just because I've seen me in my dress and accessories, and I look damn good, boy, and I know you'd notice.

If only we had time. More than twenty minutes, more than thirty on the phone,

maybe.

Please forgive me if I act a little strange/

for I know not what I do/

Feels like lightning running through my veins/

Everytime I look at you, Every time I look at you/

Help me out here, all my words are falling short/

there's so much I want to say/

want to tell you just how good it feels/

when you look at me that way, when you look at me that way.

Oh, and by the way,

I remember hearing your heartbeat.