...You're still the good-for-nothing I don't know

Hi, and welcome back to your daily dose of teen angst!



I wish I had happier, non-boy or -friend related problems to relay here, but it's for those kind of problems I require a blog. I mean, small problems like a C on a math test would have me upset for maybe an hour or two until I got home and vented to my mom. Boy and friend problems are difficult, you see, because only selected few hear the problems, and they get annoyed from it. Sure, I tell my mom roughly about boys, and a lot to all my friends, but there are some things I just can't say in so many words without feeling bothersome.

In addition, like with the math test scenario, that situation can be remedied by studying and working harder in class. I can't study people quite right. And working harder on people is a tricky process, because people are all so different. I must analyze as I go, and often my plans are shot to heck. So this here blog is my lame attempt to sort out these problems.



And though I wish I could report some happier news here, I use writing and blogging as a release. Happiness I keep and use and get high off; depression, remorse, fear, confusion, that I need released.



Now, on to today's lengthy post.




Chelsie is seriously ignoring me this time. Sure, in mid July, we got to hang while her boyfriend was at work. I told her everything eating me about Sam, and I realized how much I missed girl time with her, since I'm always ditched for her BF (that's boyfriend, in case you don't know). I've gotten used to it, but something really urked me off when I went to the beach earlier this month: I got word via the internet

a) Sam was single

b) Jack, the closest thing I have to an Ex, was dating one girl who went to Chelsie's tiny school.



Now, apparently for a good part of the year that girl tortured Chelsie.



When I texted Chelsie my information, she informed she already knew about Jack and her "friend." Because she and her Beau were going to double date with them.



I admitted to her I felt betrayed. She didn't apologise. She just asked what else could she do but accept.



I was more than a bit miffed. For you see, in my analytical mind, this was a sign of the Chelsapocalypse; I've felt for years Chels was kind of mocking me for never having a boyfriend.



And this was the clincher: Despite the fact that FOR MONTHS she hated this girl and was tormented by her, she was ready and willing to go on a double date with her and my "ex," for the simple fact this other girl had a boyfriend.



I thought myself crazy. I admit it, that's a bit of internalizing thar.



But it's true. Even Jack agrees; I've been talking to him lately about everything: highschool, the Olympics, and even Sam, but that's a topic we'll get back to.



See, ever since seventh grade when Chels made her first boyfriend with Shane, a meek little rocker boy from our tiny middle school, she tried to convince me I needed a mate too.

So she tried in vein to be matchmaker to me and my best male friend, but I just didn't want that.

She really hasn't tried setting me up with a guy again.